If I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more.
prelude
I am a serial list maker. Since I was a child, I’ve habitually organized my brain and comprehended my feelings by writing everything down. I have gone through over sixteen journals and have about 300 lists in my notes app. The lists range from the most arbitrary things to ones involving life changing decisions.
Most of my posts on my Substack originated from ongoing lists on my notes app, like books with beautiful prose, my film & television show seasonal binge rotation and my cool vocabulary glossary. I like the fact that lists are a visual manifestation of everything I want to memorialize and immortalize in my brain.
One of my favorite lists is an ongoing list of things I love or consider perfect. Specific material things on the list change often (like my favorite perfume or a book I’m obsessed with at that moment), but other things have stayed since I made the list ten years ago. I am sometimes very worried about things and moments I love passing by me without realizing it, and this is my remedy.
Here are some things from my very long list:
things i love
almond croissants
warm sun on a spring day
clean spaces
freshly washed bedding
fiction that feels like brain food
dark wood furniture
the paris review’s hue’s hues column
early morning beach walks
alphabetized lists
slow slice of life movies
writing essays on books and movies
making playlists for people
floppy paperback books
clara schumann’s compositions
warm bread with butter and flaky salt
parfums de marly oriana
changing posters on letterboxd
books published between 1920 and 1980
the outro of supercut by lorde
subscribing to new favorite substacks
snoopy
baking anything with blueberries
the lovers ii by rene magritte
new yorker magazines
long distance friendships
la la land
essay collections
cherries
the pride and prejudice (2005) soundtrack
espresso martinis
fairytales and folklore from different cultures
finding an underrated artist to listen to
family dinners
caudalie vinoperfect serum
articles about art history and paintings
a clear, starry night sky
pilates in a pretty studio
knitting scarves for friends and family
searching up the menu before leaving home
art galleries
colorful and striped bedding
making homemade pesto
rereading favorite books
the intro of dreams by the cranberries
coincidentally saying something at the same time with someone
drinking a hot cup of tea before sleeping
jane austen
an organized fridge
moleskine notebooks
a good morning routine
my selected love poems playlist
late night facetime calls
bon iver in the colder months
cool pantry essentials and condiments
finding cash in my winter coat the following year
the calm and quiet of early mornings
the piano outro of chiquitita by abba
my grandma’s dumplings
gold jewelry with pearls
trashy reality shows
classics over 500 pages
looking at a painting and feeling emotional
burgundy accessories
rose & raspberry jam
interlude i: what i read this week
I am still reading Intermezzo with Emma, which has been a dream. We’re reading little by little so we can actually appreciate the writing instead of skimming through it, and buddy reading + discussing it has been really helpful in allowing us to do so. Other than that, I read The White Book by Han Kang, Before the Coffee Gets Cold by Toshikazu Kawaguchi, and reread Mr. Palomar by Italo Calvino.
The White Book is the first book I’ve read by Han Kang, and it was beautiful. In the book, the unnamed protagonist elegizes and ruminates on the color white while grappling with her sister’s death. I do love meditations on color (Bluets by Maggie Nelson is another favorite). Before the Coffee Gets Cold was a book that my best friend recommended to me almost two years ago, and I didn’t love it at all. I completely understand why people love it, but I thought it was repetitive and the ending…annoyed me.
(here is my goodreads)
Here are ten articles you should read this week:
For those who wanted the articles from my recent Instagram post:
interlude ii: what i watched this week
I finally watched Challengers, which I 100% regret watching after the hype died down. It was good as I expected, and definitely worth all the positive reviews it got. The cinematography was beautiful, and every moment of it was so razor-sharp and not wasted or bloated at all. I could not look away at all because each second was wrought with tension, and I just really loved it. I also rewatched Ratatouille (because of the Olympics…of course), which is always a delight.
(here is my letterboxd)
Show wise, I’ve been watching so many limited series lately. I watched Shrinking, which was so phenomenal. It was so funny and heartwarming and everything I like in a comedy. I have no idea why Apple TV makes such good shows, and then we hear nothing about it. I also watched Platonic, which I didn’t really like. I’m now rewatching Derry Girls!
Video essay wise, I watched this analysis of cycles of violence in Sharp Objects (TV show), and am making my way through this very very long comprehensive video on Greek Mythology.
heavy on the ‘searching a menu before going to a restaurant’
fiction that feels like brain food 🙂↕️🙂↕️🙂↕️